Reviewed by S.W.
Birthright
I don't know if any book on the subject, which has occupied women's avid interest ever since Chava, mother of homo sapiens, is called by the title of this review. But it is very suitable. Its main message is that every mother-to-be deserves the right to experience birth as it was Divinely intended, as naturally as possible.
Sarah Goldstein firmly believes that the birth process, under normal circumstances, should proceed in its natural course. It is an experience all pregnant women should aim for and not deny themselves circumventing it, and possibly causing damage to their babies, through the use of painkillers. The author, in her daily life activities, has devoted much effort to raising the level of awareness of the importance of childbirth education and has acted as a liaison between community doulas (birthing companions) and the hospitals in Jerusalem.
"Hashem blessed women with incredible spiritual and physical strength to further His will in this world by giving birth. We rejoice in this special relationship with our Creator, and our hearts swell with pride at every opportunity to strengthen our connection with Him - and childbirth is one of the most intimate and intense parts of that relationship."
That sets the elevated tone of this book. In fact, the stories compiled here which tell of instances when women had to opt for C-sections, have an apologetic tone, as if to acknowledge that anything other than a natural delivery is second best, a deprivation of the natural birthright.
Our last book review was on shidduchim. Shidduchim has vied for all women's captive interest, and I imagine that stories on this subject are far more versatile and varied, spanning continents and so on. In fact, I, myself, wondered how I would feel about reading a WHOLE book on so many women's different birth experiences. After all, how different can the details really be: birth in a taxi, birth at home and so on. There is just that much variety one can expect with the given facts and timetable.
Still, I read each story with renewed interest and wide-eyed wonder at the miracle of birth, through the eyes of Jewish women. In fact, disregarding the fact that my baby just turned twenty-two, I was able to relive the process, contracting with the contractions, expanding with the experience.
"Birth should be a positive challenging adventure... a time for spiritual growth. It is a time to test ourselves to our limits and beyond at a time when we are transformed from having a mother to becoming a mother."
The most outstanding and unusual story in the book is the account related by Rebbetzin Yitty Neustadt, as told to her countless times by her famous father, R' Ezriel Tauber. It tells the amazing facts of her grandmother who gave birth to a healthy child in Auschwitz and was hidden, right there, until the end of the war.
The entire family was miraculously reunited after the war. A clue to this miracle may very well be in his mother's insistence in maintaining family life throughout the most difficult periods of the Holocaust when, as was testified, no one else in her town was using the local ritualarium.
We read about breech births, about babies turned to the right birth position in the nick of time and the various segulas to bring this about. For you Jerusalem mothers- to-be, there is the one of visiting the Sataf, a natural spring - a very scenic and popular picnic area near Hadassah Hospital, and drinking from its waters. These waters have been bottled and sent to women in their ninth month to effect the turnover. Claimed to be effective in most cases!
Throughout the book, the author repeats time and again that all the ideas, methods, nostrums, etc. are not to be taken at face value but that respective rabbinical and medical authorities should be consisted in each case.
We have births underwater, births at home, premeditated and not. Births of twins, expected and not. C-sections, scheduled and not, and natural births after C-sections. Wheelchair births. There is nothing boring about this book though technically, I guess the process does repeat itself and the outcome is usually the same, with the fifty-fifty toss up of girl/boy which doesn't really make a difference.
There are the accounts of the infertile who never lost hope, and how we, as a private-public out there should relate to these ladies in waiting, even before they are expecting their blessed event. But they wait and pray. How can we encourage them without hurting their feelings? A very moving and practical chapter.
Special Delivery is a very sensitive book, full of humor, insight, common sense and uncommon experiences. Very Jewish and strong on hashkafah. Compact and packed.
Highly recommended.
A few excerpts to get the feel of the book:
First, one about an all-boy family, written by Batya Jacobs. On her way to the hospital...
CHAPTER: "IT'S A GIRL"
"Remember to get it right again," all the boys had said. "And if you get it wrong, swap her for a boy. Nobody will notice." My boys, bless their cotton socks.
The tears streamed down my face. It must be transition. Transition from getting ready to give birth to the actual process of birthing. Ladies "go funny" in transition. They normally just want to forget the whole thing and go home.
Then there is the incredible true story of a woman about to give birth in a car which has just stalled.
From CHAPTER: BEACON IN THE FOG.
"Don't stop here. Oh, it's dead!" My husband thought I meant the baby when I was talking about the car. He was beside himself.
Suddenly he saw a young man walking down the sidewalk in our direction, carrying a bag. "We need help," my husband called out to him.
Was this Eliyahu Hanavi? We needed help, but from a man? How could he possibly help me? What should I ask him to do... The five seconds it took the young man to reach us felt like hours.
My husband said, "Please help us. My wife is having a baby in the car."
"I am an obstetrician, he answered.
[How Divine Providence maneuvered this incredible scenario is well worth reading. Take a deep breath - and enjoy the entire book.]
Printed in Yated Ne'eman 6 Kislev 5765 (November 19, 2004)
