 |
Alter Ego
This page-turning, suspense-packed Jewish novel depicts a Jewish man who has rebuilt his broken life - but whose past continues to haunt him.
|
"Reuven?" Yossi sounded surprised. "You know this man?"
Rina was silent, but Reuven could imagine the litany of questions that must be running through her mind. He turned to look at her. Her emotions, poorly contained as always, were now spilling across her face: confusion, concern, anxiety. His own demeanor had probably engendered most of those emotions; she had never seen her husband afflicted by such distress. She had a tendency to let her imagination run wild; Reuven would have to see to it that that tendency was contained in this case.
He returned his gaze to the newcomer and took a deep breath, steadying himself before he spoke, the words addressed to his other companions. "I did know him...once. A long time ago. And I would never have expected to meet him in a place like this." The implicit question was obvious.
Gordon Stevenson laughed. Unlike Reuven, he was maintaining complete composure. But based on what Reuven remembered of the man, that too was to be expected. "All right, Reuven, you caught me. I only came here because of you."
That statement was also staggering, like a direct punch to his abdomen. Of all the questions that stormed through Reuven's consciousness at that moment, one emerged. "How did you know to look for me here?"
Gordon waved a hand airily. "Even though you seem to have thought that I simply vanished into thin air, Reuven, I knew full well that you still existed, and I've taken the liberty, here and there over the years, to check up on you and find out where you were and what you were up to. So I knew about that rabbinical school that you're in, and I knew about this weekend also. Never mind how. And don't look so surprised. Actually, you look like you're going to faint. Maybe we should go outside and get some fresh air."
Somehow, Reuven found himself standing outside the building moments later, just beyond the glass doors, still facing Gordon Stevenson, with Yossi between them, his head turning from one man to the other and back again.
Rina followed them outside, wringing her hands, leaving an impatient Malka to guard the luggage. The air was crisp and cool, with a hint of moisture, like the advance warning of an impending rain.
"So you followed me here," Reuven finally managed to say.
"Why?"
Gordon seemed taken aback. "Really, Reuven, after all this time, I would have expected a much warmer greeting than this. Hello, how are you, how have you been...what's been happening to you all this time? Instead I'm being interrogated about why I went to the trouble of looking up an old friend-"
" 'Old friend' is a very simplistic way to describe our relationship."
Reuven was finally regaining some of his strength, recovering from the shock of this encounter. Gordon seemed to be more real now; this meeting was taking on a dimension of normalcy. But every word he uttered rang painfully in his own ears, as he realized that the explanations he would eventually have to give Rina-as well as Yossi-would be quite difficult.
"Look, I'm getting hostile signals from you. This is not at all how I envisioned our reunion."
Reuven's tone softened. "I'm sorry, Gordon. I really am. But...this is quite a shock to me...and not exactly welcome."
A change came over the other man's features then, something resembling a pained expression. Gordon said softly, "I see, Reuven. I do. I expected this in many ways. But...I didn't just come looking for you now because I was feeling nostalgic."
"I gathered as much." Reuven kept his tone carefully cold, emotionless.
"I came to tell you...that you're in danger."
Reuven stared. "What are you talking about?"
Gordon suddenly looked around uncomfortably. "I can't talk to you about it, Reuven. Not here, not right now." He glanced at Yossi. "And not with your bodyguard here, either."
"Sorry. This is my good friend Yossi. And my wife, Rina." Rina gave a little nod; Yossi mumbled something in response.
"Whatever. I can't talk now at all. I've got to go. I'll get back to you soon; don't worry. For now, forget what I said. The danger's not immediate."
"Wait!" Reuven exclaimed, but Gordon, with another quick, nervous glance over his shoulder, suddenly leapt into motion, sprinting across the huge parking lot until he disappeared into a nondescript white sedan.
Reuven watched, his heart pounding, his hands shaking, as the car began to move, at first slowly, then picking up speed, gracefully exiting the parking lot and disappearing into the distance.
He stood for an interminably long time afterward, watching the spot where it had been parked, as if it had left behind a spectral imprint that would give him some information, some clue as to what had happened and why his life seemed to be on the verge of shattering now, so suddenly and unexpectedly.
He was afraid, in many ways, to turn back around; he sensed Yossi's presence on one side and Rina's on the other, both questioning, both wondering, both undoubtedly speculating. He did not want to tell them. He did not want to give vent to the storm of emotions that was now building inside him, threatening to consume him like a raging fire. He wished fervently that this had never happened, that he had decided to skip the annual retreat this year, that he had simply walked away when Gordon Stevenson had decided to make a reappearance after so many years.
After so many years...
Reuven turned back to confront Rina and Yossi. They stared at him wordlessly, their faces merely expectant, neither demanding nor pleading for an explanation.
Reuven reentered the hotel without another word.